Weight Loss the Final Chapter Week 2
To win a boxing match on points you have to win more rounds than you lose on a judges card. Well week 1 I won that round. But week 2 I lost that round.
It is hard for me to replace the calorie burn, emotional release and feeling of running. Every time I am hurt or cant run I desperately trying to find balance. Trying to emotionally balance my life, my emotions.. I normally feel like staying afloat till I can run is the best description on what I try and do.
The week was a mess. I would like to tell you the grand story of how I conquered the week but that would be all lies.
From Mon-Friday I struggled daily with the grind of my wifes bday week, my foot hurting and then the added bonus of my hip flexors hating the bike/swim.. As I have started lifting heavier and harder through these last 2 weeks my tennis elbow or now elbows have been inflamed as well. But I did have some moderate success on thursday in regards to pushing the pace but ended up just being exhausted in the process.
I am very aware that I am am emotional person and in the past have turned to substance abuse etc etc to curb my emotions and hide from them. Usually I have running to even me out which i couldnt use anymore. So what normally happens is that I eat when I get emotional. I dont eat 3 pizzas like i used to but I still splurge on eating no matter what it is.
I hate even talking about this week as I blog about it. I just want to skip to the end.. But hey i agreed to do this i guess.
Saturday I felt weak all day. I felt anxious all day about eating out for my wifes bday. I made excuses, deals and agreements all in my mind. None of them came true. Thats what happens when you let emotions dictate what you do. Although I didnt feel emotionally I knew I was. The emotions are really from not being able to race since it was that night. As we say down to dinner I looked at my watch Race time was now. I was happy enjoying my wifes bday and seeing our friends but it only made me more emotional. So emotions drove the bus on Saturday.
Moving on Sunday morning I had the epiphany that I would take a week off. At first it sounded like a great idea (which it is). I need to rest and I know that I wont be able to race or vacation in peace if I dont heal this foot asap. So taking a week off and not pushing the envelope on every corner is probably what I need but not what I need. By mid day Sunday I was already anxious, nervous and emotional about not doing anything. It was hard for me to comprehend doing nothing. I started to rationalize things I could do and what I might be able to accomplish in this week that I dont normally get to do. I started of thinking the reports I have read from Anna Frosty, Emelie Forsberg and Anton Krupicka on their times off. I remember why they take time off, how they do it and the emotions of not running.
So here I am monday morning writing this blog. Taking a week off hasnt happened for me in probably years. I have always pushed to hard, to fast and to failure. But I need a week off. My body needs desperately to recover and mentally I need a win. I need to win at something that is challenging. I need to give this week all I have similar to how I train. I read alot of posts about training the mind as well and this is similar maybe to a 100 mile race. I have never done this, never tried this but NEED to do this.
So here we go. 7 days Mon-Sunday 1500 calories a day. No working out. Only rolling, stretching and sauna. 7 days No excuses.